Each time I do this I gain some new perspective, it’s like it’s own mini experiment happening in my house. This round of 21 days felt exceptionally long because I started a week before the official start date to try a few of the nightly routines I was going to share. By day 14 I wasn’t sure if I had another week in me – mostly of cooking but also of turning in early and having such a generously slow bed time ritual. I felt like I was ready to get out, to have a glass of wine and feed the extrovert side of myself.
Here’s what I noticed ( if you care to read). On Friday I was feeling run down and had a headache for way longer than I have in a long time. The childcare I normally have cancelled on me all week so I was really craving some time alone. Jeff had a late meeting so we didn’t eat until much later than we normally do. We stayed up chatting and having a beer much later than I had been staying up previously. I skipped my nightly routine for the most part and just had a hot cup of tea in bed. I didn’t breathe, I didn’t put my legs up a wall – I had such a crummy sleep – tossing and turning, and just in general feeling like I was awake for most of it. Yesterday evening we took Agatha down to the beach with a picnic. We ate when we normally would, had a few beers and just enjoyed the sun that finally was shining down on us. We came home, put her to bed and watched a movie. I was able to drink tea and water through the movie ( and eat a lot of dark chocolate ) and then created space for myself to wind down. I lit candles, put my legs up the wall and practiced alternate nostril breathing. I wrote in my journal, I took a pause and then I fell asleep.
Sometimes I hate writing a play by play ( like above ) because (a) it puts a lot of me out there and (b) it leaves a lot of room for judgement – both by myself and by you. And that’s scary. But the reason why I do it as annoying as I feel like I sound sometimes, is to come back to the basic thought of finding balance suited to you. What works for me might not work for you but I would encourage you if you’re curious to find what those things are that do in fact work for you. Just because you want to drink beer, wine, have a Gin cocktail, eat pizza, go have a burger, dive into a doughnut doesn’t mean you’ve become this insanely unhealthy monster of a person. You’re fucking human. So rock on.
All I’m saying is that when you do find what works for you, make space for it in your life. When I sleep better, I wake up feeling more whole, more energized and more myself. I wake up feeling confident and like I can make better choices for me and my family. I feel rejuvenated after doing this but I also feel so ready to welcome some new things into my days. So the question is, what’s your rhythm? What is your version of slow? Of balance? What’s your jam?