In my prenatal yoga class we started talking about pregnant women as a sort of archetype – one that represents a whole whack of things for a wide variety of people.

 Take for instance, the lady on the street that stops you and just reaches down to touch your belly. Or that friend of a friend that reaches out to share a personal story or a piece of advice.

 Fertility and pregnancy bring out this primal part of each of us. One that we might not even notice or be aware is there. It makes us want to touch and talk and take part in the wild adventure that’s growing in front of us. Comfort levels vary from person to person, some women might not care at all that someone wants to reach out and feel their growing bump while others might be totally uncomfortable with it. Women that already have children were quick to chime in during our group discussion and share that when you actually have the baby it can get even more intense – lots of touching and holding and pinching those delicious cheeks. It can be a lot. It can be overwhelming (I obviously can’t speak for this part of the conversation, but I can imagine). 

 I think, like most things fertility and pregnancy related, it’s hugely personal. You need to figure out what your own comfort level is. The thing is, you don’t always know what that is until it happens.

 The decisions you make for yourself, your body, your future baby, your stomach, your belly, your upcoming adventures, those are for you to make. Each of us has the right to think about and dream about what we want our journey to look like. I wrote a post a while back about that place called home and in it, I talked about what my future looked like to me. I thought about what it really would feel like. And I still do. Especially now that I have a tiny person growing inside of me, I think about what I want life to look and feel like when they arrive. And guess what? I’m allowed to. I’m allowed to dream about long lazy days, big walks snuggled up, alone time, time to breathe, time to eat, time to just be.

 Part of the joy of this whole journey is the joy of sharing your news. I can’t even tell you how much love we felt when I announced our pregnancy on LFJ. It was a total blow-me-out-of-the water-lovefest. Receiving love is a skill. Learning to feel and appreciate the love you are given, but also learning to not let it overwhelm you, because sometimes it can start to feel like that journey isn’t even real anymore, like it isn’t yours.

As your body changes, whether you’re working on getting pregnant and are changing your diet/lifestyle, or you are pregnant, you can sometimes get this out of body experience (especially at the beginning of pregnancy when your physical body doesn’t feel like it matches your internal body). Going at your own pace and realizing where you’re at will help you to take a deep breath and slow down. It all goes a lot faster than you think and savouring those tiny moments are what will help to keep you grounded.

Keep in mind that certain people will always project things, share things and want contribute to this new part of your life, especially in the case of fertility and pregnancy. It’s like this weird innate part of (most) of us that’s just built in. Try to create the space you need to feel like you’re really doing what you want to be doing and making the decisions that are important to you (By you, I mean the big you- your partner and your tiny person). Create the boundaries you have to to make you sure you’re participating in the journey you always dreamed of.  And when you’re feeling strong and ready you can let whoever else you to want join in on the love fest.