YOU’LL NEED COFFEE SHOPS AND SUNSETS AND ROADTRIPS. AIRPLANES AND PASSPORTS AND NEW SONGS AND OLD SONGS, BUT PEOPLE MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE. YOU WILL NEED OTHER PEOPLE. AND YOU WILL NEED TO BE THAT OTHER PERSON TO SOMEONE ELSE, A LIVING, BREATHING, SCREAMING, INVITATION TO BELIEVE BETTER THINGS. [ J.T ]

I’ve been thinking so much about what WE need these past few days. As mums, as women, as people. Of course it’s easy to sit on the internet and social media and talk about how amazing our tiny people are. And they are. But they are just that, tiny people. They can’t talk to us, they can’t really communicate with us other than through tears, smiles and cries. So that leaves most of us alone all day with not a lot of grown up human interaction. That in and of itself is exhausting and challenging. To not admit this to ourselves is not to admit the obvious – that staying at home and caring for our babies in the beginning is damn hard work. 

I thought today how much I wished I had a twin sister or best friend who happened to have a baby at the exact same time as me. Someone who could come over a few days a week with their tiny person just so I could have that connection, that human conversation, something that we all need. I’m pretty sure that’s why ‘mom groups’ were created. This idea that we all need someone to lean on, to divulge what we’re feeling and what’s really going on, or simply, someone to pass the time with other than our babies. This sense of community is so incredibly important and something that I hope I can create someday soon in this small pocket of the world that I live in. A day once a week where women and their babes can be together and talk about like minded things. 

I’ve realized in the past few days that before Aggie was born I did a lot just for myself mentally and physically, but since May, I haven’t done any of it. Not even something as superficial as getting a manicure or something as big as going to see my acupuncturist – someone I was talking to and seeing weekly. It’s crazy how quickly that shift happens. Of course it’s normal, but there is something to be said for the things we need to be good, to feel like ourselves, to feel put together and like our emotional selves are taken care of. We need to rely on people and we need help sometimes. 

This is an invitation for not only myself but for all of you to remind yourself what you need to be good. To feel grounded, to feel pretty, to feel strong and capable. To feel like best version of yourself. It’s not going to be instantaneous, and you’re not going to feel like that every day. But once in a while we need to remember that we exist in this totally whole sense independent of our babies. Without the help of our people, without  all those little pieces, it’s hard to put our w h o l e selves together sometimes. 

*STAY CONNECTED FOR INFORMATION ON THE FIRST LFJ MAMA GET TOGETHER WITH BABIES COMING THIS FALL*