It’s been a wild few weeks of feeling a general disconnect to the internet and most forms of social media. Feeling like I wasn’t sure what to post, what to write and what to say, which usually means that I’m just not sure how I’m feeling. Because let’s face it, social media and blogging can bring about a whole group of insecurities and general feeling of not enough.

And that’s so not okay.

Because we’re all enough. We’re all so much more than enough.

So I went to bed last night at 9pm. I had the intention of crawling into bed to write but with a huge rainstorm outside and having just had the most wonderful bath, I thought sleep sounded a hell of a lot better. And I slept, and slept and slept. And woke up to Aggie chatting away at 6:45am. That was glorious. We got up, put on some music and crept around trying to quiet – key word there being trying. So there was that.

Then there was this massive farm fresh chicken that I had sitting in the fridge doing exactly that – “sitting + salting” according to my friend Martha Stewart. This past week Aggie and I drove 45 minutes south of Minneapolis to the middle of nowhere to get 2 dozen fresh farm eggs and a huge 5.5 frozen free grazing, wild roaming, grass eating chicken. It was also kind of amazing. It was the first time she came face to face with a massive cow in the wild which still didn’t deter her from shouting and pointing “Dog” at it repeatedly.

She is a wild force of nature. Filled to the brim with personality – but my heart thinks that most parents probably feel that way around this time in a toddler’s life. They are pushing boundaries and exploring what their limitations are. Our job (if we so choose to accept it) is to create a safe environment for them to adventure and explore and push in. I’m trying my damn hardest to do this. So much so that you’ve probably noticed I started using the hash tag raising a wild child. I started reading a book titled “How to Raise a Wild Child” and another called “The Garden and the Carpenter” – all addressing our relationship with these tiny humans and how we can possibly better help them to adventure and learn and explore within their own bodies and mind. It isn’t that I feel like I can’t do this naturally ( and I don’t think we need books to know how to raise babies ) but I am a person that loves to learn so when my interest is peaked, you can bet there is a shopping cart filled with books on the topic on Amazon.com.

I think the one thing that I keep coming back to is that they aren’t “ours”. Which is so wild because we grow them from nothing, we house them for 10 months, we birth them ( and in turn give birth to ourselves in a totally new way ) and then slowly over time we are simply here to help guide them through life. To encourage and instill and mentor and love but never to take ownership. Always to have distance enough to allow them enough room to grow. I have always loved this quote by Khalil Gibran on children.

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

So there’s that. And then there’s the chicken and the rain and new city and the task of raising a wild child, of connecting with my husband, of sleeping, of replenishing my body and of centering myself. It seems crazy that at this point in time I wanted to host another Seasonal Mama Dinner but in fact it feels like the perfect time. I am exploding at the seams with this idea of self care and love and replenishment as Summer comes to a close. Last night, before the bath and the sleep, I opened a package (thanks to my own Mama Bear) that was filled to the brim with supplements. Iron, B 12, Adrenal Strength and a good old women’s multi. You can read more about how I feel about supplements here and here ( in short I think real whole foods are ideal ) but when you’re dealing with all of the above, sometimes it can just feel good to be supported and taken care of in it’s most simplest form. A hot bath, a good sleep, a rainy night, a roast chicken and a mouth full of good stuff that you know is going to build you back up.

I have been asked by a lot of people if I’m gearing up to try to make another baby with the new 21 Day Holistic Eating and Living Journey coming up. The answer my friends is that’s none of your business ( it isn’t but I’m just kidding! ). The answer is no and yes. The answer is that I took two whole years to get myself ready to make a baby the first time and instead of saying to myself “I want a baby in 1.5 years from today”,  I am saying I am ready to start restocking my body up.

I am ready to start filling ME back up to the brim as best I can. And the start of that is this dinner and the 21 day HE + LJ. I want share a few tricks and thoughts and I want to let go of a few things that I’ve been holding onto. Because we all have things that we are still holding inside of ourselves even if we’ve let them go mentally.

*There are only 2 seats left so if you’re feeling like getting in the goodness, find your way here!*